It's only been in the past decade or so that I've come to realize how precious and unique cousin bonds can be. We've known each other our whole lives, spent many an hour as kids playing together at assorted family gatherings.
Our dads were brothers - Gene was a farmer, Dennis worked in finance and real estate, Vic, my dad was a machinist. Our life paths branched similarly - Rebecca worked in finance, Monica in dispute resolution, Julia in HR/Finance. Colleen kept things running smoothly at home for her husband and four kids, Cindy did the same until branching out, as they got older, to coordinate mission trips - traveling around the world as she did so. (I did software engineering.)
We've all continued to show up at the family reunions to stay connected - and I've always left those events knowing I didn't have enough time to finish learning what I wanted to know about what's up in people's lives.
Last spring, Cindy proposed we find a time to gather at my house in Missouri so we could have some extended chill time, and I was thrilled at the prospect. So she didn't have to do the drive alone, she reached out to my sisters and a few of my other cousins to see if they wanted to come. It didn't take her long to gather the carload. (I have many, many cousins...)
We had a blast!
We cooked some, swam some, went to visit the Nelson-Atkins museum. We talked, laughed, shed a few tears, and talked some more. We spoke of our roles within our families, the similarities of our upbringings, how family dynamics and birth order shaped our lives.
At one point, instead of listening to the words of the conversation, I sat back and just listened to the rhythm and flow of the sound. It brought me back to my childhood - a memory of dozing in the sun in the back of the station wagon, listening to my dad and uncles talk nearby. Then, it sounded to me as if one person was talking to himself, the inflections and tone were so much alike. Coming back to the present, I realized why my mind had opened that long-neglected door - these women all sound like me. The rhythm of our speech flows from our common roots. (Perhaps it's part of the bond?) I know the cadence spoke to me of home and love.
I am SO grateful they came on down, for the chance to spend time together; the chance to enjoy, deepen, and grow our connecting ties.
Love Is.
