These are the people who knew me when. As 'when' recedes further into the past, I find myself relishing the chances I have to walk down memory lane; to feel the tug of connections still there despite the wear and tear of years; to strengthen those connections by showing up to retrace their lines.
This past weekend found me in Waterloo, IA, to meet up with my mom's side of the family. She came from a large crew - was one of 14 children. She and all of her siblings have gone to the place-beyond; there is one aunt by marriage still around. Aunt Diane, and a good number of my cousins, made it to the annual gathering. Everyone in the cousin crew now sports a healthy amount of gray in their hair. A few people had brought representatives from the next two generations down - they added welcome movement and spice to the group. I mean, SOMEONE has to pop the balloons!
We had the usual abundance of delicious food for our potluck lunch. My conversations swung between 'what's going on with you now?' and 'do you remember when?' There was a quiz to see who could name all of the 40-odd cousins based on childhood pictures - I could only name about half. Then, Karen came up and now the names flew - we started to fill out an answer sheet together. We were still missing a few of the older cousins, people we never really knew, but Chuck came up behind us and filled in the blanks. We put all three of our names on the sheet, fair is fair. I would have thought we'd be eliminated from the competition because we cheated, but they gave us the prize anyways. (My share of the loot was a bag of what I am told is the best popcorn you can buy, grown right there in Iowa. I can't wait to pop it and give it a try.)
I drove up the night before the gathering, and stayed with my brother Tony and his wife, Susan. It's been well over a year since I'd seen them and I enjoyed having a few hours to spend in deeper conversation than can happen at the large family events. (Not to mention the chance to enjoy an ear of the fresh Iowa sweet corn Susan cooked us for dinner. Can't beat it.)
The weeding and mowing and cleaning and laundry, etc. all need to be done, and I do them, but these activities don't feed my soul. Seeing my people, spending a few hours renewing the traces they have left on my heart and in my memories - THAT helps me feel the love. I slept well last night, tired from the drive and cradled in sweet memories.
On the face of it, it was a lot of driving - about 11 hours all told - for a short event. As I was driving home, my overriding thought was, 'Worth it!'
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