Sunday, November 24, 2013
It hasn't reached all the way inside just yet. I've been doing the daily-thanks-on-FaceBook thing and it's been helping; since I know I have to come up with at least one thing each day, and I try not to repeat, it helps me to keep my eyes, mind and heart open to the good things in my life.
But. I must admit I'm stuck in the doldrums.
I thought the foundation guy was going to come today to start on my remodeling project, but he didn't show. I called him twice, but still haven't heard a word. (Why do contractors do this????) I didn't think I'd let myself get my hopes up that it was actually going to start, but given the way my attitude slumped once I realized he wasn't going to show, I think my hopes had gotten up despite my negativity.
It doesn't help that I have a stiff neck this weekend. No looking up or to either side. With exercise and stretching, I've gotten it loosened up enough that is doesn't hurt constantly, but it's still pretty darn sore. I think I'm going to have to break down and get a chiropractor's appointment tomorrow. I haven't seen anyone since my practitioner-cum-therapist died last spring. I still have her number in my phone; can't quite believe she's not going to come back to straighten me out. I think this pain-in-the-neck is an acute reminder that it's time to get out of denial mode and find someone else I can see, at least on occasion. **sigh**
This will be a short work-week, and I have fun plans for Thanksgiving, so perhaps the combination will help jolt me into a better space. I hope so. I don't have a lot of tolerance for me when I stay whiny for long.
Sunday, November 10, 2013
I can always tell when I'm letting it get the upper hand. I find lots of 'nevers' and disastrous situations in my thinking.
For example: They're NEVER going to come do the foundation and the plumbing leak is getting worse which means the pipe is going to break and water is going to get everywhere and RUIN my newly refinished floors before I can get this STUPID remodeling project started!
It's been hard to watch these last few nice days pass by with no progress on the project. I was so happy when I finally had my permit in hand. I NEVER thought it would take so long to get someone out to do the work.
My more rational mind tells me I've got someone lined up who I think will do a good job for me. He's just got other commitments ahead of my little project. And do I really want someone to work for me who breaks their commitments? When we were talking about the work, he asked all the right questions. Someone like that is worth waiting for, says my rational mind.
I've been trying to focus on what I CAN do. I can get the basement shower ready to go, so that if that faucet does give up the ghost, I'll be ready to go. If the faucet goes, it's not beyond my skill set to install a temporary faucet in the bathroom if I don't want to make the trek to the basement before I absolutely have to. I know I'd have to tear up the kitchen to make the repair, but that wouldn't break my heart.
Stop. Breathe. Trust. I'm working on it.